AQ. The bee-yatch!!!!!!

Long time .... no write! (Thanks for the prompt Yabi!)

It's been busy, as bloody usual. Zac's been a proper little bastard of late. Playing up at school in class and in the playground, so I've been trying to deal with that first and foremost. It's nothing a murder wouldn't fix.

It's also springtime and the weddings are picking up too, so I've got to stay motivated and diligent there. Did one on Saturday .... unmitigated disaster. 50 peeps in a room built for 100+ so zero atmosphere. Two warring families. Only 20 of the 50 peeps wanted to dance at all .... equals hard work for the fucking DJ! By 11pm the bride was crying (literally) to me about how her guests were all fucked. I couldn't necessarily agree with her .... but she was 100% correct! Boring arseholes.

Wedding tip - The guests make your wedding. Invite peeps with a pulse.

Back to reality..... the reality of an impromptu 6 handed shuffle yesterday!!! It started with a txt from C-nut around midday. Fancy a shuffle? Sure! Deerhunter and I had already talked about catching up for a brew or 10, so I knew he'd be good to go. And Mooshie was off shift and available! Excellent! And Leebie, who we 'met' in a poker sense a month or so back. And one more, a noob, Johnno .... who was only with us for a couple of hours. Not an overly experienced player, but not usless either.

So we were staring at a very decent starting kitty. 6 x $25. Not to be sneezed at! Even moreso when there were a couple of rebuys. $10 will get half your stack again, and double rebuys are allowed.

Long story cut short. I ran okay early. Small pocket pairs which never amounted to anything. 3's, then 5's and 10's. Only won anything with the tens. Then pure card death set in, and I basically got blinded away with nothing to work with whatsoever. When shortstacked I ended up shoving pocket 9's into the Deerhunter's Queens. Shit happens. That's poker.

Rebuy for my original stack. Fuggit. There's $45 of mine in the kitty. Then C-nut busts out and does the same. Rebuys his original stack.

At this stage Mooshie was chipping up to a crazy level. Chips ooooooozing everywhere, as we like to say! Rivering everybody. Even me. Bastard! The Deerhunter was travelling pretty gooot and Leebie was playing as tight as a fishes arsehole, and getting zero cards to speak of.

Then I started running okay. In fact, pretty well for a while. I hit bottom set when Leebie had top pair decent kicker and called my shove. He had me covered but only barely. He rebought for half his original stack. Another $10 into the kitty. I had a couple of other decent hands. One in particular, I was in the BB with 9-10 off, and C-nut, to my right popped my $300 post flop bet to $600 on a 9 high board. I really didn't think he had me beat so I popped him again. He folded, and all but admitted he was stealing there. At least my cajones are still attatched! It wasn't an automatic reraise there with a 10 kicker!

Then (and this is the main reason behind todays post) I ran some BIG HANDS into MONSTERS. I'd chipped up to take over the lead and was feeling really solid with my game. Not spewing chips and picking my spots well. But it didn't last. I then had my mentally scarring experience(s) with AQ.

Now to the gory details.

C-nut was managing to whittle away his rebuy very, very quickly. Overly aggressive in the wrong spots more than anything. That's his game. Anyway, when quite short stacked, he shoves. I look down and find AQ sooooted. Chance to eliminate one of my toughest competitiors at the table, and I've got him easily covered. My chance of being ahead here have got to be pretty good with him pushing the action. I call.

Nice one Dillo. Run AQ into AK. C-nut doubles up. Faaaark!

Not even 5 minutes later, after I picked up a couple of small pots and C-nut had donated more chips to me, I managed to do EXACTLY THE SAME THING AGAIN. AQ soooted into AK!

E-X-A-C-T-L-Y!

Now I'm a savvy enough player to know that AQ is nothing more than an A high hand. I really have been working on my game sooooo hard for sooooo long now, and I cannot believe I didn't have the sense to pick a better spot here, at least ONCE. I mean, I'd love some feedback from any of you .... ALL OF YOU!

Was this just a case of bad timing / bad luck / bad poker? Even C-nut said I had to call them both because of stack sizes and the chance to eliminate a player. But I cannot believe that I sucked that bad, and it cost me any chance of the win. I know shit happens, but these two hand really, really ate at me afterwards .... and it still is today. Sickening shit.

The crowning glory was when I was getting short again, and I get the bee-yatch again ... AQ. I raise to 600 pre. The blinds are getting higher and higher and there's heaps of action. C-nut (bastard) calls.

Flop. A - J- rag.

C-nut bets, I raise, he jams.

I tank ....

What has me beat here? Quite a bit I suppose.

Pocket bullets, pocket hooks and bottom set. AJ. Paired A and the rag. AK.

But I'm getting to the point where it's death or glory. Knowing I could be behind, I call.

C-nut flips over ...... Ace fucking Jack. I should've known and IGH.

FARK!!!!!!!! SO FUCKING FRUSTRATING......

So all in all, a very fun but ultimately infuriating. I'm really puzzled. I generally back my ability to lay down good, even premium hands. But I didn't at the pointy end last night. Even my harsh self criticism tells me that all three calls were justified based on stack sizes, but I still come out of it thinking what if ...? To a degree, it's a case of that's poker, but it could be a leak as well.

FUCKED IF I KNOW!!!!!

Result. Deerhunter, the winner of something in the order of $200!
2nd and money back. Leebie.

Will post soon on my fantasy NBA Hoops draft and squad too. Roll on season 07-08!

P.S. Have I mentioned how I really fucking HATE AQ at the mo?!

True story!

I saw HEAPS AND HEAPS of Olympic hoops in Sydney in 2000. Absolutely awesome. That dunk by Vinsanity was one of the most incredible things I've ever seen with my own two eyes in my entire life.

The reason behind this post? Well mainly because the NBA season is just around the corner, and I'm psyched! I'm commish in our Yahoo! Fantasy NBA league again this year.

Live draft happening this Sunday evening Western Australian time.

Can't wait!

I blog my ineptitude.

Monday night fun 'n' games with the Deerhunter.

Basically I smashed him all night. TAG mania central. Only to have this hand come up at the end.

(N.B. Bear in mind I was playing great, and The Deerhunter had changed his game up considerably to try and put me off my game. Hence this ugly, UGLY hand...... the final one for the night.)

Deerhunter - Ac5d
Me - Ad6c

I raise $150 to $200 pre.
Call.

(Fair enough from both sides.)

Flop - 6h - 5h - 5s

Deerhunter bets $500 into $400 pot.
Call.

(My read was that this was a c-bet. Maybe AK or AQ unimproved. Weaker 6? I had a piece and I thought it made sense to call here. DONK ALERT!!!! Even IF I DID NOT put him on a 5 why would I not pop him in this spot? I have no fucking idea!)

Turn - 7d

Deerhunter bets $2500 into $1400.
Call.

(I still believed my read was right. I hadn't 'missed' a read all night. Why would I change now? I chose to call. Not a standard play from me. I normally raise somewhere in a hand like this, but to control an already SUPERMASSIVE pot, I just called.)

River - 6d

Deerhunter insta-jams. Insta-mistake.
I call. "Book"

Silence ......

"Worse book. Fark! You had two outs. TWO POSSIBLE OUTS and YOU HIT!"

Silence. Deafening silence. The sound of a shattered man.

"My bad dude. I didn't put you on that. Horrible suckout. Soz bud."

"Two outs and you hit. Why did you call my turn bet?!"

"My bad buddy. You had me all the way."

"Two outs. TWO ...."

"Soz man. Really. But that's poker. You've done it to me!"

"Shiiiiiiiit. I'm going home."

Horrible, horrible play be me. Despicable. A soul crushing suckout AND FOR THAT I HUMBLY APOLOGISE TO THE DEERHUNTER AND THE POKER GODS.

But like the Terminator, he will be back. Oh yes. He WILL be back.

The only thing I hated about this hand from The Deerhunter's point of view was his insta-jam when the board paired at the end. (And I did say so.) Unless he thought I was drawing to the straight ....which I would never have called that turn bet to keep going on this board... I had to have at least a solid piece, and that 6 on the river could've - should've set the alarm bells off. Oh well. Now I'm just being a c#nt.

Then again, I should've raised post flop and found out I was behind earlier in the hand. My bad buddy! Really!!!!

Bracelet number .... dunno!

Managed to organize a Mates cash shuffle with little to no effort on Friday night. Zac (my boy) was (finally) spending some time in Perth with his (friggin') mum so I was off the leash.

I was keen to at least blow off some steam with the Deerhunter, so rocked around there with a carton of Hollandia and got into it earlyish. 3.30pm. Picture perfect South Western Australian afternoon. Puuuuuuurfect for a brew or ten on the front deck!

After a couple, we decided to go down to one of the local shopping centres and pick up some new cards. Sweet! Bicycle cards DO rock very hard. A$20 for two packs. How's that for poker nerdness?!

So after we get home and start flicking some, I say to the Deerhunter, "Shit, It'd be great if we could organize an impromptu shuffle. Send C-nut a txt. He might be heading down from Perth". Less than 5 mins after hitting send, he was on the blower (phone) and said he was in, as was a noob (to our games) who shall be herefore be known as Leebie. He's played before, but is maybe - not quite as advanced as us three. But it was great to get some fresh blood into the mix.

The good, no GREAT news is, well .... I pulled it off! The bad news is that I have practically NOTHING to tell you about how or what I played. It was quite strange.

My BEST POCKET PAIR WAS FISH HOOKS.
After that I reckon I had NINES ONCE.
I had AK ONCE.
I had KQ ONCE.
I hit ONE SET ALL NIGHT.

Seriously. I had sweet fuck all to get excited about all night. I had average cards, at best. But ....

I managed pot sizes really well.
I played shit hands from the blinds that I hit, well.
I stole heaps and heaps.
I laid down problem hands early.
I played the big stack really well late.
I never once spewed chips.
I made some big, big laydowns when I might have been behind.
I got my money in at the right times when shoved on, at the pointy end.

C-nut was first out and rebought. Leebie was next out and rebought. C-nut busted again next and sat out from there. Deerhunter was next out. Then I busted Leebie with AJ on a J - 9 - x board. I bet out on my TPTK, he jammed as the shorty with A9. I called. He didn't improve. Game over. W00t!!!!!

Apart from that, there's really nothing much else to say! Except I'm stoked! $70 in front after you took out my buy in! I think C-nut is getting a bit pissed off tho. (In a good way!) He hasn't 'won a bracelet' in ages. Deerhunter and I reckon it's probably been 12 months or more! Considering how strong he was when we first started shuffling up, that's a serious drought. It's also validation as to how much Deerhunter and I have stepped up our games over the journey.

Roll on the next time!

Sorry this is really quite a boring recap. There just wasn't any monsters to go over!

Geekdom is for .... GEEKS!

Found this weird and wonderful Nerd Quiz on Astin's (awesome) blog. It's one of the best going around, but most of you will know that already.

It really confirms what I already knew.

A) I'm not a nerd, and probably never will be!
B) I'm a blokey bloke but one who's not afraid of my emotions or expressing them.
C) Computers suck balls unless you're playing poker or blogging.

Surf on over if you're bored as bat shit!



And for the record Astin ..... You're a NERD!!!!! W00t!

Casino recap.

Well, time to bring you up to date with my casino adventures on Friday night up in the big smoke. It was certainly interesting, let's put it that way. We (meaning Big Johnny, Suze's Bro-in-law) sat down at a table around 10.30pm after a HUGE meal at Alure.

Talk about strange though. I'm sure you Yanks would be interested (if not perplexed) about how Burswood run things. For a start, there's only a dozen tables active and one of those is an Omaha table. Because there's so few tables operating, you've got to register and get a ticket to play, then they page you over the in house intercom. Pathetic really.

Even more pathetic is the structure of the games. (I can't wait to hear some American/Canadian reaction to this!) They way they describe it, is ... $10, $10, $20, $20. So basically it's $5 SB, $10 BB, then a max of three $10 raises pre flop, and after that a maximum of three $20 raises on any street. That means one thing the way I play. You can't jam and stop the action when you're in front! I hated it! L-O-T-S! I mean, I love my poker, but this was just too constricting for my tastes. You'll see why as I go thru a few hands of note.

Overall I was really happy with my play. Remember I never normally play a full ring game so it's a good learning experience for me. I just applied as much of my knowledge that I gained from the Harrington books as I could and played position TAG poker. Even tighter than usual, mainly because I was short stacked pretty much from the get go. My $200 buy in (which was the minimum buy) was all I could muster cash-wise, so I had to fold a lot of hands I'd normally be happy to speculate on. Sooooted connectors and stuff like that. I just couldn't afford to go into a hand that I wasn't a great chance of hitting. If I didn't feel I could call a pre flop raise after limping, then I didn't bother. Hence, I folded heaps and heaps of hands. Heaps .....

I only really misplayed one hand in particular. Pocket 7s when I was first to act in a three way pot. Another guy had hit his Queen and I should've got away from that earlier than I did. Representing cards in this style of game was absolutely pointless. A complete and utter waste of time! It probably cost me $40. I knew my mistake immediately and learned from it.

My first big hand of the night was an absolute ball-tearer. Seriously, it's one that'll stay with me for a looooong, looooooooong time. Pocket Queens, with a lot of limpers ahead of me. I raise $10 to $20 to see a flop. Nearly everyone who was already in calls. (Grrrrrrrrr! I mean fuck! How the hell do you protect Ladies while still keeping a reasonable pot going?! Fucking frustrating as.) So I was absolutely ready to get away from this if an Ace or King came along.

Flop. Q - rag - rag rainbow. W00t! Trip Q's!

Checked to the player on my right (the only guy shorter than me at the fucking table!) who bets $20. I raise to $40, after all, it's all you're allowed to do! He calls. Everyone else folds.

Turn. Q! Double W00t!

Player on my right pushes the rest (i.e. piddling stack) into the middle. I instacall.

I flip over pocket Queens and say (for the first time in my life) "Quads" !!!!!!!!

So I turned quads and win something like $130 for my trouble. What a pain in the arse! Of course the bigger stacks weren't in this hand. Of course the only guy with less chips than me was in the hand. So gross.

But incredibly gratifying!

I then had pocket 9's which didn't amout to anything and a A - 10 - rag board. I had to fold that. The pain in the butt thing was I was definitely in front preflop. But unless you can throw out a sizeable raise it's over as soon as that flop came. CRAP!!!!

So I changed my game accordingly. Limped with pocket pairs. Boats once, Snowmen once and Ducks once but never spiked anything. Folded A - rag a lot when out of position. Played hands like K9 sooooted but never got close to my flush. Out quickly when I didn't hit.

Anyway, I folded and folded and folded with nary a sniff of another made hand for ages. Then as i was almost blinded away, I pick up AJd which I popped to $20 pre flop. Couple of callers.

Flop. 8 - 9 - 10 rainbow. So I pick up an OESD. Bet of $20 before it got to me, and my rationale was, no point popping or trying to protect my draw here, so i just call. Couple of other callers.

Turn - 7 and I make my straight and pick up an okay pot. $150? Hardly huge tho, but it did keep me in the game a bit longer.

Then came some of the most frustrating hands. I get dealt AK offsuit twice in 15 minutes. And both times I flop TPTK. Now I know this isn't quite a dominating hand, but I couldn't protect the hands I had! Calling stations galore and they sucked out on me twice! One guy rivered trips despite me putting heaps of pressure on during the hand. I didn't call his river bet coz I figured I was dead when the board paired. He showed and my read was right.

The other Big Slick hand when I made TPTK there was a runner flush out and it came. But at least I had the balls to get out of there when I was beat. Once again it was unprotectable. FARK!

I saw some amazingly shite poker by other players too. One hand I just shook my head. Thankfully one or two other savvy players at the table also gasped in horror.

Donk with big stack and pocket 6's (as it turns out). Flop comes all spades. Donk first to act, bets out. Couple of callers. Turn card comes 6s. He bets again. Callers. River card 6h. He makes quads!!!!!!

Now think about this. He had no piece of the flush board on the flop. None. He had BUGGER ALL OUTS, EVEN AFTER HE MADE HIS TRIPS ON THE TURN, because he was behind someone ....

...... and he hits.

Appalling, bastard poker. What a goon!

Just as amazing was the reaction of this other donk to my immediate left who says, with a straight face ... after he's just pulled this corker of a move .... "He's a pretty good player. He left with a stack of cash last week when I was here."

I explained that he was behind the whole way, hit his card and that based on his play I just watched he was a shite player, and the guy just looked at me like I was mad.

Staggering. Downright staggering.

So in the end I up and leave the table about 1.30am with $70 in chips left. I was happy to have had a crack, but the structured game sucked balls and I couldn't play the way I'm accustomed to in our home cash games. It was a great experience, and I was RAPT to have finally made quads, especially at the Casino, but all in all it was more frustrating than satisfying. No limit Hold'em? I WISH I could play that instead!!!!!

Dunno that I'd bother next time.

Footnote - The Deerhunter went to one of the cash games (Saturday night when I was doing a wedding) that I mentioned were a possibility last week and left the winner and with $70! None too popular with the host either apparently! But he wasn't the guy who invited him. To soothe the host a bit, The Deerhunter said he'd host next time! A very mushy soft game he said too!

I want me some of that action! Ha!

Casino tonight baby!

Off to Burswood up in Perth tonight for a bit of a family thing. Suze's lovely parents have offered to take all 'the kids' to the place to celebrate Suze's mums 60th birthday! I'm pretty strapped cashwise, which will make it hard top get a big enough starting stack to trouble the biggies, but I'll probably have a crack. It'd be a sin not to! I've heard the Omaha game isn't very hard either.

Here's hoping I find a $100 note in the carpark on the way in!

Wish me luck!

Fantasy NFL - I'm a bunny!!!!!! H-E-L-P!!!!

Okay you crazy Americans. I need some help. I've looooong been a demon (even if I say so myself) at Fantasy NBA Hoops, particularly among clueless Aussies who know sweet f*ck all about the great game in the States, but this year is my first NFL Fantasy comp and I'm 'blowing bubbles'! I mean my team's going alright.... I'm 3-1-0.... but I'm perplexed by some of my players and how they're doing relative to their pre-draft rankings. Keep in mind, I didn't 'tweak' my rankings at all pre-draft, coz I know NOTHING about the game or the players! It's taxing I tells ya!

Here's my squad at the mo. I've made about three or four changes at the fringes. Nothing major, but it might be time to do some radical surgery in certain spots (if I'm reading things right.)

Tom Brady (Picked him up in the 4th round. Very lucky score the way he's been playing.)
(NE - QB)

Calvin Johnson
(Det - WR)

Laveranues Coles (Been solid as.)
(NYJ - WR)

Ahman Green
(Hou - RB)

DeAngelo Williams
(Car - RB)

Kellen Winslow (Another nice player apparently at this position.)
(Cle - TE)

Marques Colston
(NO - WR)

Willis McGahee (Been bigtime)
(Bal - RB)

Ronald Curry
(Oak - WR)

Steven Jackson (My first pick. He's either been fucking woeful or injured. Thorts?)
(StL - RB)

Reggie Bush (2nd pick and nigh on useless too. Worth persevering with?)
(NO - RB)

Josh Brown (Ok and a keeper by all accounts.)
(Sea - K)

Baltimore (Rated #1 defense pre season but has been consistently spewing points. Why?!)
(Bal - DEF)

Ed Reed (I've replaced my entire defensive unit. Best I could get.)
(Bal - DB)

Sean Jones
(Cle - DB)

Derrick Johnson
(KC - DL)

Love to get some peeps opinions 'with a clue'. Mainly on Jackson and Bush.

And the Ravens, are they incredibly over rated? Detroit and Seattle are available. Should I stand pat or cut bait?! Also, do you recommend having another QB on the bench? Don't QBs strain an eyelash every other week?

I DO like my flexibility my stable of RBs and WRs gives me in terms of matchups and dealing with injuries, but I'm thinking I should give myself some flex in other areas? That's where you come in!

See? I don't know the nuances in Fantasy NFL.

All I DO know is that we don't need padding and helmets in Aussie Rules! W00t!!!!!

Cheers heaps!